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Monica Lewinsky Was Walking Along The Beach

One day as Monica Lewinsky was walking along the beach awaiting her
Senate trial testimony, she came upon an ornate bottle that had washed
up on shore. Curious, she picked it up, brushed off the sand, and lo
and behold a genie popped out.
"Greetings, Miss Lewinsky," the genie said. "Since you have released
me, I will grant you one wish."
"Well," Monica replied, "I'm going to be on television a lot for a
while, and I want to look my best. I wish you would get rid of these
love handles."
"Your wish is my command," said the genie. A wave of his hands,
a puff of smoke...and her ears fell off.