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Oneline Jokes

You think country and western are the two kinds of music. You think cow tipping should be an Olympic sport. You think paprika is a third-world c... more>>
1. Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals. 2. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 3. Set up a ... more>>
Q. What do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common? A. They both have the same middle name - THE ... more>>
* You have the capacity to learn from mistakes. You'll learn a lot today. * It is a poor workman who blames his tools. * You can't win. You can't br... more>>
1. Indecision is the key to flexibility. 2. You can't tell which way the train went by looking at the tracks. 3. There is absolutely no substitute f... more>>
What did the judge say when a skunk entered the courtroom? Answer: Odor, Odor in the court!!! ... more>>
What did the Indian say when he saw Jesus, walking on the water? Geez, that white guy can't even swim. ... more>>
1. If you can't find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break off the tip, it's an improved screwdriver. 2. Try to work alone, an audience is rarely ... more>>
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.... more>>
The teacher says, "I wish you'd pay a little attention Mary." "I am paying as little as I can Mrs. Bell," said Mary. ... more>>
1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it. 2. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and co... more>>
10. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings; they did it by killing all those who opposed them. 9. If at first you don't succeed...try ... more>>
1. What is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. 2. Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition. 3. A woma... more>>
EVER WONDER... Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why you don't ev... more>>
"That math professor's marriage is falling apart!" "No wonder! He's into scientific computing - and she's incalculable!" ... more>>
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